Spoiled

There is something to spoiling oneself.

It's the idea that only I know what I want and therefore can be the only person to provide what I need when I need. Normally, I put off my own spoiling of myself to take care of others, or provide for others, because being spoiled is a kind of selfishness.

I think I want to change my thinking.

I like to have little foodies prepared for me. I like to listen to calm music while I work. I like to sip on coffee or tea (perfectly prepared, or I won't drink it) almost consistently  If I don't have either of those beverages, I want water. Instead of being angry at how wholly unfair the world is, perhaps I should focus on the teensy little things that I can make fair for myself. Instead of waiting for someone to light candles in honor of me, perhaps I should put my own hands to work at lighting candles in honor of me. Other people don't have the time to spoil me.

The thing is that time is, as I've stated before, the one thing for which there is no refund. It feels like the ultimate selfishness to spend time on myself.

I think I want to change my thinking.

I see more cocoon-building, candle-lighting, and ukulele-chilling in my future.